Saturday, September 30, 2000

Survey I Stole from Someone Else's Diary

1. Name: Holly Rachael Zintel.
2. If you were going to be the opposite sex, what would your name have been?: Matt or Zeke (my parents thought it would be cool for me and my brother to both be Z.Z.s.)
3. Age: 16.
4. How old do you look?: The people in the casinos never ask me to stop loitering anymore, so I guess I look 21.
5. How old do you act?: 78. What? I don't like swearing, drugs, or little punks.
6. What's the last song you sang?: "The Way You Want Me To" by 98 Degrees.
7. There was no #7 listed: How 'bout that.
8. What did you do yesterday? I wrote some more of my story, "The 1st," watched Where The Heart Is a couple times, hung out with Zach and Sarah, and sat around being sick as heck.
9.Today?: I'm really sick, so all I've been able to do is sit online, mostly at The Paperpusher's Message Board.
10. What are your plans for the weekend? I'm going to the pumpkin patch and Great Lakes Crossing! Hurray!
11. Do you kiss with your eyes open or closed?: I don't know. Isn't that horribly depressing?
12. Sexiest thing about the opposite sex?: Lips, hair, eyes, and EYEBROWS! WOOOOOOOO! And shorts that reach just above the ankle, with sandals. Oh yeah, something about personality... hilariousness.
13. Do you sing in the shower? Yup. I put in a CD, crank up the volume, and sing along as loud as I can. My family's not too happy about it.
14. When is the last time you cried? Yesterday, when I was watching the part of Where the Heart is where Ashley Judd was trying to talk about her kids being raped by her boyfriend.
15. Who was the person you liked the longest? Tim, my brother's friend. That was from 6th grade till... did that ever end?
16. Are you in love with anyone right now and they have no idea? Yup.
17. Have you ever said I love you to someone and meant it?: Of course.
18. Does anything on your body itch right now?: Yes. My right ear.
19. What color is the carpet in your bedroom?: Blue.
20. Have you ever had a member of the opposite sex in your bedroom?: Yeah. People of both sexes think my room is cool, and they go in there just to stare in awe at the fact that I have some many posters, you can call them wallpaper.
21. Who is the sexiest man alive?: You know, the one who's always standing and walking... Rory Curtis? Yeah, that's the one.
23. If your house was on fire and you could only save one item what would you save?: My huge box of pictures.
24. Who was your first best friend?: Mom and Sarah.
25. Who is the next person you'll buy a b-day gift for? Sarah.
26. Whats your fave number?: 2. And 40, which is Daria and Trent's ages added together.
28. Have you ever gotten detention? Once, when my whole 4th grade class was acting up, except for me and my friend. It was retarded.
29. Where is your fave place to go on vacation? Las Vegas.
30. Have you ever given/recieved head? No. Great. Now I'm going to be asking people that all day...
31. Do you like playing truth or dare? No. It sucks because, I lose either way.
32. How many times a week do you bathe: Seven.
33. Perfect Wedding Song: "Swear It Again" by Westlife.
34. Do you have a boy/girl friend?: No. *Sob*, *sob*.
35. A crush: Yup.
36. Who is the person that knows the most about you?: Mommy.
37. Whats your deepest darkest secret?: Mom.
38. Funniest Joke you ever heard? Q. How do you make Holy Water? A. You boil the Hell out of it.
39.Saddest movie: The Green Mile.
40. Scariest movie: Bouldergeist.
41: Last movie you saw in the theater: Final Destination.
42. When's the last time you rode a bike: 'Bout three years ago, I think.
43. Who is the last person who asked for your digits?: Molly.
44. What's it like outside: It looks nice, but it's probably freezing.
45. What is the first thing you do in the morning? Think "I have to pee, but I'm too tired to get out of bed."
46. Last concert you went to: "Weird Al", Touring With Scissors.
47. Next concert you are going to: I don't know. Amy Grant's not doing her Christmas concert this year, so I'm just waiting to see who comes here.
48. Have you ever had phone sex?: No! I swear, that *so* wasn't me...
50. Do you know how to wash clothes?: My dad showed me, but I'm too lazy to do it myself, so he does.
51. Do you have any peircings?: My ears.
52. What do you wear to work?: I don't go to work. Thank God!
53. Can you touch your toes without bending your knees? I have toes?
56. Food you couldn't live without: Linguini with marinara and stuffing.
57. Do you own handcuffs?: Some little kid ones.
58. Do you like your friends?: Usually.
59. Who has hurt you the most: Zach when he beat me up in 3rd grade for a couple of lousy sixth grade girls who wanted me to get off the swingset so they could use it.
60. Are you a flirt?: No.
61. How many sexual partners do you think you'll have by the time your 20?: Zero. Not just 'cause I'm ugly as a mug! Same reason Jessica Simpson won't do it for the moment. Waiting to get married. See, if I throw Jessica Simpson's name in there, it makes me look a little better.
62. Whats the meanest thing you have ever done to someone? My mom was on the phone with this dude from Texas that she met online, and I was at my dad's house, so I called her other phone line. It rang about fifty times before she finally picked it up, and then I said, "Is Don there?" in my grandma Z. voice. She was extremely fuming.
63. Whats the meanest thing you have ever said to someone?: When I was about two years old, a guy at the store was smiling at me. I just turned red, started shaking, and screamed, "QUIT LOOKING AT ME, STUPID!!!!!!!!!" And at Bob Evans, when I was about the same age, I saw a bus boy pass by, and I said, "You sure are a stupid-looking guy."
64. What memory just popped into your head right now?: My mom telling me the story of me saying that stuff.
65. Do you miss anyone right now? Tim. What the bloody hell happened to Tim?!
66. Are you tickleish? Yeah. Everywhere. Sarah and Zach know that, the jerks...
67. Would you ever go skinny dipping?: Hold on, I've gotta lose about 100 pounds first...
68. Have you ever kissed (I mean really KISSED) someone you weren't going out with? No.
69. When was the last time you got kissed?: My dog, Chyna kissed me before I left my mom's house the other day.

Where The Heart Is

Boy, I tell ya, nothing aside from Daria, Skittles, and linguini with marinara, rules more than that movie. I rented that yesterday and watched it twice after I'd already seen it in Vegas, and on the plane ride home from Vegas. There has never been a sweeter guy that Forney. Wait... Forney... HA HA HA HA! What a hilarious name.

Anyhoo, you know what's sad? No one ever leaves me notes! LEAVE NOTES, I TELL YOU! I DON'T CARE IF I KNOW YOU OR NOT! Especially since the people I *do* know *never* leave notes!

Zach and Sarah told me that tomorrow, after my dad leaves for Vegas, I can pick what we do for the day! I *never* get to pick! This ruuuuuuuuules! First, I'm going to force Bobby to come along. Then I'm going to drag them all to the pumpkin patch. Pumpkins are extremely neccessary for autumn. Then, I'm going to make them go to Great Lake's Crossing, and we're finally going to see that stupid Nutty Professor II movie!

Ah! Sarah's birthday is coming up and I don't know when I'm going to be at a mall without her!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I'm so *blows nose* sick. I wish I could actually do my hair today. But the gel gets to my nose. MISERABLE AS HECK, I TELL YOU! All I can do is read Daria fan fiction. Not that I'm complaining *grins*.

Halloween is coming! Hurray! That means, I get to dress up like one of my family members (I think I'll be Zach this year) and hang out at my aunt Barb's while we watch the Simpsons' Halloween Special.

Welp... see ya.

--Loyal Tom Sloane-Hater,
Holly the "Holy" Zintel ():-)

MARGE: Kids can be so cruel...
BART: They can?! Thanks, Mom!

Wednesday, September 27, 2000

*Sob* I'm Sick!

Welp... nothing cool has happened to me in forever. 'Cause I'm sicker than the lyrics to that Sublime song, "Caress Me Down." I've got three words to describe this week: Dry heaves suck. Oh yeah, and: Stiff necks blow. Okay, I think that says it all.

Um... the new 98 Degrees CD is cool. That song, "Yesterday's Letter" is nifty as heck. I don't see why everyone likes "Dizzy" so much, though. It probably just reminds them of 'N Sync's distorted cybersex song, "Digital Get Down." "Alert! Your satellite beam has been interrupted..." Oh, sorry. That song's catchy. Hey, at least you don't *really* have to hear me sing, right?

Okay, I'll now leave you with the lyrics to my favorite new 98 Degrees song, "Yesterday's Letter" before I go out to dinner with Mom, Julie, and Grandma.

"Yesterday's Letter"
By 98 Degrees

I wrote a letter yesterday
Just trying to explain
Couldn't find the words to say
'Cause you are so far away
So far away
I wrote a letter yesterday
It's so hard for me to face
That it had to end this way
But my love will never change
Will never change
When I search my soul to find the truth about the love we shared
I wonder why you're no longer here

(Chorus)
You can just walk away
But I don't feel the same
My heart still beats for you, breathes for you, sings for you
And those feelings will never fade

I can hide my pain
But I can never hide the way I feel for you
I've been talking in my sleep
About the way it used to be
Girl, I pray that you'll hear me
And then I'll see you in my dreams
Oh, in my dreams
But I can't forget the words you said
To move on with my life
And no matter what, I'll carry you inside

(Chorus)
You can just walk away
But I don't feel the same
My heart still beats for you, breathes for you, sings for you
And those feelings will never fade

Sooner or late, you're going to realize
That this type of love happens once in your life
So, open your eyes, girl, and see what we could be
Come back to me

(Chorus)
You can just walk away
But I don't feel the same
My heart still beats for you, breathes for you, sings for you
And those feelings will never fade

Aren't those about as nifty as Nick Lachey suddenly appearing at your front door? Well, not quite, but...

Saturday, September 23, 2000

AH! Clinton Shook My Hand!

I heard a couple of weeks ago that Bill Clinton would be coming to Flint, MI (my home town here), but I only found out the day before it happened that he was coming to my school!

I go to Mott Middle College (the high school in Mott Community College) and Clinton came here to unvail some new technology that's now available to the disabled. My friends, Molly and Angie and I stood outside, plus I met up with my brother's friend, Tim there, and we waited three hours after school got out to meet Clinton. It was freezing cold, and I didn't know we'd have to go outside to do it, so I didn't wear a coat! I was standing out there in a T-shirt in the freezing cold. Brrrr... I didn't even care about meeting Clinton anymore after half an hour of standing in *that* weather.

Those secret service agents were jerks. They wouldn't let us take our backpacks with us, or anything. I thought my Discman would have been stolen! And dang, Clinton shakes too hard! Ouch! My hand hurt for about an hour... It made me kind of mad that it didn't matter if we wanted to meet Clinton or not, we were just *going* to. My teacher, Mrs. Sperlich took pictures of everyone shaking hands with him, but she said her camera sounded funny after she took 'em, so she doesn't know if they came out! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Anyway, so, that was pretty cool. Except for the freezing cold part...

Monday, September 18, 2000

Hmm... Uh... Hm...

Welp, on Saturday, Sarah, Zach, Bobby, and I went to Great Lakes Crossing (a cool out-of-town mall). I got some B-day presents for Rory and forced Zach to get an early B-day present for Sarah, 'cause she would want nothing more than that necklace.

Anyhoo... My point is, Bobby is very confusing. The guy kept flirting with me just to be a jerk (I don't care what Zach and Sarah say, he was trying to be a jerk). Then, while Zach and Bobby were in a store, Sarah told me that she has a crush on Bobby! She can't have a crush on Bobby! She's going out with Zach! Then, today, my mom E-mailed me and told me that her friend thinks that Bobby has a crush on her! For Heaven's sake, we need to just throw Bobby at some girl, and force them to go out with him to get the guy off of our backs.

Welp... that's it for now. See ya.

--Loyal Tom-Hater,
Holly the "Holy" Zintel ();-)

Tuesday, September 12, 2000

Polycystic Retardation

Welp... whether you want to hear about this or not, I went to a gynocologyst this morning. She told me I was supposed to be going to someone else, but that they didn't like women, so she had to take care of me.

The thing is... I have this weird thing called polycystic ovarian disorder. I found out today that it's the main reason I've been fat my entire life! That part of it is treatable, and that's cool, but you know what sucks? She said it's going to be really hard for me to have kids because of this. And I want kids! Dern. This is gonna suck.

I PLAY STEEL DRUMS!!!!!!!!! WOO HOO! It's fun as heck, Vern. Okay, welp, see ya.

--Loyal Daria Freak,
Holly the "Holy" Zintel ():-)

Sunday, September 10, 2000

Which Side of the Family am I From?

On Labor Day, I spent the day with my dad's side of the family. They're so much fun to hang out with because I've studied their characters, and I always know what type of thing they're going to say. Plus, I can impersonate almost everyone on the Zintel side of the family.

Yesterday was my grandma Shoup's birthday, so I got to hang out with my mom's side of the family. The Shoups are a lot different than the Zintels when I look at both families. The Shoups are fun to hang out with because they're so nice to each other and I love that about them.

My mom, Zach, Sarah, and I were all watching old home videos of my family, and everyone was together... both sides of the family. Jennifer and Allison used to hang out with me at the same time, and now they don't even know each other anymore. This is the only thing that has ever upset me about my parents' divorce. It tore the family in two. Don't get me wrong, I love having two Christmas mornings, but it seems so strange. On Thanksgiving, I'm at my grandma Z.'s, and Zach will say, "Okay, we've gotta go to Grandma Shoup's now." Everyone there will get all upset and say, "Can't you stay just a little bit longer?" It's really depressing.

Then I stop and take a look at myself. Everyone's always told me that I'm very nice, and I *really* try to be, which would make me a true Shoup. But my mom tells me she can see the Zintel side of the family in me sometimes, too, and they're thought of as being... well... mean. I don't think of them that way, though. They're all having fun when they fight. It's all an act. But when the Zintel side of me comes out, people act offended. They think I'm really trying to be mean.

People seem to expect me to either be from one side of the family, or the other. I don't know what I am! I'm nice and mean at the same time! HELLLLLLLP! IDENTITY CRISIS!

Whew,
Holly.

Thursday, September 7, 2000

Good Ol' Reliable Bobby

Yesterday, Zach and I went to my mom's, and we brought Sarah and Bobby along. I was so glad to see Bobby! Sarah had teased me all week because this one survey asked the question, "Who do you miss most?" and I put Bobby, because he hasn't been over to my house in at least two months, and he used to come over every other day. I don't know why, but whenever I *mention* a guy, Sarah thinks that I must have fallen madly in love with them! Right after I put Bobby down as my answer on that survey, he broke up with Tracey! So, then Sarah was all, "Well, you *must* go out with him *now*!"

So, last night, I thought I'd make Sarah shut up about the whole thing. When we picked Bobby up, I went, "YAY! BOBBY'S BACK!" I kept sitting on the couch by him and going, "I love you, Bobby!" and announcing, "It's time to hug Bobby! Awwwwwww!" I kept calling him "Beautiful Bobby," too.

When it was time for bed, though, Sarah still spoke about my needing to hook up with Bobby. *Sigh*. I've tried telling the truth, saying, "I would never go out with Bobby." I've tried telling her I like guys that I don't! SHE STILL THINKS I'M INTO BOBBY! GOOD... *GOD*! WHAT IN THE NAME OF PEPPERIDGE FARM STUFFING AM I GOING TO DO TO MAKE SARAH SHUT UP ABOUT THIS?! ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!

If Sarah doesn't cause me to have a stroke, I'll be back. See ya.

--Loyal Daria Freak,
Holly the "Holy" Zintel ():-)

Tuesday, September 5, 2000

Wow. School actually doesn't suck

I never thought it was possible... but school isn't going to absolutely suck this year! Although the counciler suckered me into taking theater and drums, I think it's actually going to be pretty okay.

As opposed to Carman-Ainsworth High School, this year, I'm going to Mott Middle College. Today was my first day there, and *dang* are the classes a lot smaller than they were at C.A.! And everyone is so nice! Back at C.A., just about everyone was a jerk! Too bad Sarah can't go to Mott with me, though. Anyway... I'M GOING TO SCHOOL WITH COLLEGE STUDENTS! WOO HOO! That includes Zach, too, and that's cool, 'cause he's my ride home.

This school is also pretty nifty because there's no cafeteria (there's just a "student lounge") and that's great because I *HATE* cafeterias! And you can eat in class! And some days are like, hours shorter than others. This school is gnarley as heck! I didn't know anything like it existed, or I would have gone there *years* ago. Anyhoo, I suppose I'll shut up now. See ya!

--Loyal Daria Freak,
Holly the "Holy" Zintel ():-)

Saturday, September 2, 2000

When I Was Your Age

Here's some nifty "Weird Al" lyrics that I think you'll enjoy. Unless you're a DISRESPECTFUL PUNK! Yep...

"When I Was Your Age"
By "Weird Al" Yankovic

Let me tell you, sonny... let me set you straight
You kids today ain't never had it rough
Always had everything handed to you on a silver plate
You lazy brats think nothing's good enough

Well, nobody ever drove me to school when it was 90 degrees below
We had to walk butt naked through 40 miles of snow
Worked in the coal mine 22 hours a day for just half a cent
Had to sell my internal organs just to pay the rent

When I was your age. When I was your age...
When I was your age. When I was your age...

Let me tell you something, you whiny little snot
There's something wrong with all you kids today
You just don't appreciate all the things you've got
We were hungry, broke and miserable and we liked it fine that way

There were seventy three of us living in a cardboard box
All I got for Christmas was a lousy bag of rocks
Every night for dinner we had a big chunk of dirt
If we were really good we didn't get dessert

When I was your age. When I was your age...
When I was your age. When I was your age...

Didn't have no telephone didn't have no FAX machine
All we had was a couple of cans and a crummy piece of string
Didn't have no swimming pool when I was just a lad
Our neighbor's septic tank was the closest thing we had
Didn't have no dental floss had to use old rusty nails
Didn't have Nintendo, we just poured salt on snails
Didn't have no water bed, had to sleep on broken glass
Didn't have no lawn mower, we used our teeth to cut the grass

What's the matter now, sonny, you say you don't
Believe this junk?
You think my story's wearin' kinda thin?
I tell you one thing, I never was such a disrespectful punk
Back in my time, we had a thing called discipline

Dad would whoop us every night till a quarter after twelve
Then he'd get too tired and he'd make us whoop ourselves
Then he'd chop me into pieces and play Frisbee with my brain
And let me tell ya, Junior, you never heard me complain

When I was your age. When I was your age...
When I was your age. When I was your age...

Sports Suck

God, do I hate football season... and basketball season, and golf season, and every other freaking sport season! ARGH! THERE'S *ALWAYS* SOME SPORT ON TV FOR MY DAD TO BE WATCHING! (Huffs angrily, then calms down). So, here I am on the internet, looking for a means of escape. So, I thought I'd list all of the things I hate, seeing as I'm in such a spiteful mood today... I'm also in a Spriteful mood... BRB, I've gotta get some...

Alright! Sprite *RULES*! Anyhoo... Here are all the things I hate:

1. Sports. ARGH!!!!!!!!!! They give me headaches.
2. Headaches. They're caused by sports.
3. People who beat animals. What a bunch of retards.
4. Eminem. It's hard to believe people actually buy his CDs.
5. Hugh Heffner. The reason there are so many divorces today.
6. Christina Aguilera. You know, there's such a thing as *too* much self-confidence.
7. Undressed. I don't think I've ever watched a show with worse actors, or storylines.
8. School. I've gotta go there on Tuesday... ugh.
9. People who don't like Daria.
10. Pop-up ads.
11. Marge Simpson. What? She sneaks meat juice into Lisa's food!
12. Tom Sloane (Daria's boyfriend). The man must die...
13. Idle Hands. The worse movie ever made.
14. Obsessive-compulsive disorder. It gets on your nerves. Wait... nerves. Nerves. Nerves. Okay.
15. McDonald's. If they'd really love to see me smile, they'd shut their stupid restaurant down.
16. Crackheads. Do I attract those weirdos, or what? They follow me around saying stuff that doesn't make any sense.
17. Running into people who think you're someone else.
18. That chick who went out with my crush into kindergarten, did better than me in first grade, pushed me off my bike in 3rd grade, pushed me off the bleachers in 7th grade, and still hates me for absolutely no reason now.
19. Frizzzzzzzzzzzzzz!
20. People who think I want a bunch of porn mail.

Okay, that should just about do it. The world would be better without these things. Yep...

--Holly